I take it all back - my complaining of the 3 weeks in a row with sick kids. I take it ALL back. Our family was hit with a landmine yesterday-the diagnosis of Caleb with Type 1 Diabetes. He's 10. God, did you hear me? He's only 10-no kid should have to deal with this! I have all these emotions raging through me - fear, rage, worry - you name it, I'm feelin' it right now. Most of the words I want to say would be inappropriate, but I'm sure everyone has thought of a few choice words now and then. Surely I'm not alone!
So, let me backtrack. . . About 3 weeks ago when Caleb was sick, he had a virus. No flu; no strep; just a virus. He's been over it - no big deal. Well, the past 4 or 5 days Caleb has had excessive thirst. I didn't think a thing of it at first, but one night this past weekend I was reminded of a conversation about a toddler at the preschool I used to work for, who was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. She was suddenly excessively thirsty. My heart sank. I told Dennis that night we needed to get Caleb seen by a doctor. I didn't realize I should have probably done it immediately, but God's grace was sufficient and yesterday at 2:00 we were seen by our family practitioner.
Caleb did a "pee in the cup" test - which by the way he thought was hilarious! He'd never peed in a cup before. The results showed up with a lot of sugar in his urine, so then they did the finger poke. The result was "HI" which according to the meter means over 600. A normal level for sugars is 90-150 . . . Caleb was off the chart. The doctor looked at me and said, "this is not good." I knew. I knew before I took him in. God knew - that's why He reminded me of that conversation about my friend's child.
Based on the conversations I've had with the doctors, Caleb should have been in the Emergency Room. His numbers were off the charts, but he was remarkably well for as bad a shape as he was in. But, instead of the ER, favor abounded and we immediately headed to an endocrynologist who worked us into their schedule. They were fabulous! Both the doctor and nurse were Type 1 and had learned to deal with this since the 80's. We were handed glucose meters, needles, 2 different types of insulin shots, brochures . . . my head was spinning, Caleb was crying. It was awful, but through the awfulness, God's grace abounds!
When people say your life can change in an instant - they are right. I knew this, but having experienced, gives me a whole new perspective on situations my friends have gone through. I walked around in circles this morning trying to figure out what to do with myself. I'd gotten almost no sleep. The girls needed to get ready for school. Was I going to work or staying home? What to wear? Is Caleb going to school or are we going to monitor him? A cold front coming through, does everyone have jackets? Dennis is needing to get the truck to work for deliveries. Did the kids get their vitamins? Is Caleb ok? What's his blood sugar? Can he eat this? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
My stomach still turns when I look at Caleb and see hurt in his eyes. He does NOT want this. He's old enough to know how life was before, but not quite old enough to heave a big sigh and just move on. As his doctor says, "shots suck!" I feel the same way - this really sucks!
However, as bad as this sucks, I know it could be worse. I have a dear friend who lost her daughter to a virus that attacked her heart. I have another friend whose daughter had a brain tumor. She's survived, but she will never be the same as she was before. I am reminding myself to count my blessings, as they are many. My son is a blessing and I am grateful he is still here with us. We walk on a little bruised, but we are not defeated. We raise our eyes to the One who knows exactly how we feel and reach for His hand as we move forward.
No comments:
Post a Comment